I'M OFF! YYYEEESSSS!!!!!

Ok... So... I don't know what to do with myself! I have an entire day off... with no errands to run! I LOVE IT... If I wanted to, I could just sit in the house and do nothing!... or go to my favorite park!!!... I know for sure I'm gonna stop by Aj's! It's been a minute since we've just chilled at her apartment! I miss those days, man! On the most random days, I would go over there and we would just sit and chat about any and everything! Now that I'm working more... We just can't seem to get our schedules together!!! So yea... TO AJ'S HOUSE I GO!!!

"I LOVE NEW YORK!!!"

For the last day in a half, I've been in New York!!! lol... Well not really... My friends Melissa and Sabrina have been in New York!!... but Melissa has been really doing an amazing job of updating her twitter so I definitely feel like I've been walking the streets with them!!! WHY DID THESE GIRLS GET A FREE TRIP TO NEW YORK TO A MAXWELL CONCERT?!... WHAT THE FREAKIN' HEEZY!!!!! Miraculous Manifestation?! I THINK SO!!! lol! I was sooo happy for them!!! Not only are they in the very AREA that I want to spend a few years living... but they were with MY MAN!!! My new man for the last two months!!!! Are you kidding me?! That is sooo cool! I tell you man... I have the coolest friends in the world!!! I will be picking them up from the airport at around 5:30!... I can't wait to hear more about it! Oh and I get to meet Melissa's mom! I'm super excited AND... HER MOM HAS 'LOCKS, DUDE!!! How cool is that?! I wish my mom would be cool and grow some 'locks!!! She's too much of a diva for all that though! lol

"HUMAN NATURE"

*A MOMENT OF SILENCE FOR MICHAEL JACKSON*

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Ok... So did you guys see the memorial?!... Yea, i know!... that probably was a stupid question!!!! I was sooo pleased with the service! God was glorified... Great things were said about Michael Jackson... and hopefully soon He will be able to R.est I.n P.eace!!! I really enjoyed Stevie Wonder and Usher's performances!!!! They were great!!!! Pastor Lucius' (sp?) prayer at the end was amazing too!!! BUT JOHN MAYER WAS THE HIGHLIGHT FOR ME!!!!! First of all He is soooo freakin' adorable... and secondly... He STOOD OUT!!! Most of you know that I hate doing things like everyone else!!! I HAVE to be different!!!... I HAVE to stand out! It's just who I am! John Mayer got up there and played... didn't sing a note... just PLAYED!!!! My goodness!!! I could hardly hold it together!!! I've always dreamed that I would have the opportunity to do that! I can't sing... everyone on my dad's side can freakin' blow... and They sing all over the world!!! I picked up the guitar because I wanted to be different.... I can't sing (lol)... and I want to be in the spotlight just playing and worshipping GOD!!!!! Wouldn't that be awesome?! I've always dreamed of having my own all girl CHRISTIAN ROCK BAND!!... lead guitar.... giving God all the glory!!!!... I want my music to be used to save souls, man!!! I'm telling you... John Mayer had me dreaming again!!! It's been awhile since I've sat and thought about what all I want to do musically!!!! SO GLAD I WAS ABLE TO WATCH THAT!!!... I loved it!!!!

R.I.P, MICHAEL JOSEPH JACKSON!!!!

Michael Jackson is loved!!!!! He loved the world... His heart was big!!!!! He deserved that memorial!!! He was a great man!!!... The media has tried so hard to make him a bad person... I was sooo glad his daughter, Paris got up there and spoke! Her words proved that he was great!!!!... that he was kind... and loving!!!!... pretty much the total opposite of what the media says! Michael's life ministered... Shoot!... it still ministers!!!!!!!

Anyway... I'm OFF... IT'S TIME FOR ME TO DO SOMETHING ELSE WITH MY TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HA... HERE'S JOHN MAYER'S PERFORMANCE IF YOU WANT TO WATCH IT AGAIN....

Until next time,

PCE!

"girly,GIRL!"

As promised... I'm gonna talk about the photo shoot!... but before I do that... I want to talk a little about the 4th!!!!!

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!!!!

I HAD TO WORK THAT MORNING... what the heezy?!... Who goes to OLIVE GARDEN on the 4th of July?!!!... I think I waited on a total of 5 tables... from 11am until like 3:30!!! MADNESS!!!!.... It's ok though!!... It was really nice outside so I was looking forward to leaving that place... taking a nap... waking up... and going with the girls downtown to see the fireworks!... WHY when I woke up it was raining cows, monkeys, and giraffes?! I WAS SO SAD, MAN! This was my first 4th away from home and it was beginning to look bad!!!!... BUT... I ENDED UP HAVING A BLAST!!! Sabrina got a babysitting job at the last minute ( HALLELUJAH.... PRAISE THE LORD), so the kids were gonna tag a long with us! I was soooo excited!!! I love hanging out with kids! So... I get to their house and I am WARMLY GREETED by the most gorgeous kids I've EVER seen!!! I MEAN BEAUTIFUL!!! lol... and they called me STIX!!! AHHH... I LOVE IT! I don't know how to spell their names so we're just gonna call them Girl and Boy K! :) They entertained us... THEY HAD MY STOMACH HURTING FROM LAUGHING SO HARD! I was in love!! lol... Girl K can sing, dude!!! and she had the most beautiful, long legs! She's 12... it's so obvious that she's athletic! She motivated me to run! My legs are SO gonna look like that! lol BOY K... IS A MESS!!! TOO CUTE... He has this amazing ear when it comes to music! The things he would hear in a song amazed me!... HE'S ONLY 7,GUYS! They both are gonna be great musicians! I just know it!!! They were sooo free... so happy... AND THEY LOVED MUSIC!! PERFECT... I want them... I wonder if they are for sell... Maybe I can buy two at Walmart... I'll check that out!... but yea... We didn't go see fireworks... We went to the movies to see Hannah Montana instead!!! I WAS SOOO EXCITED! I wanted to see that soooo bad when it came out... I WAS EVEN MORE EXCITED WHEN I FOUND OUT IT WAS AT THE DOLLAR MOVIE....DA BUSINESS!!!!!!!!!!! This is getting long... and I still have to talk about the photo shoot... so speeding this up.... THE MOVIE WAS GREAT!!!... I HAVE 3 SONGS THAT I'M GONNA LEARN HOW TO PLAY THIS WEEK... I WAS STRAIGHT UP TAKING NOTES IN MY PHONE!!!... That movie was the motivation I needed to get back on the guitar!!! I'M READY MAN!!! LOL

Moving right along...

So me, Renee, and Jelly were talking the other day about what it means to be "girly, girl!" lol... We had the longest list of things that make up a girly, girl... and in all honesty... THEY ARE SOOO GIRLY, GIRLS!!!! LOL... They don't think so, but God and I know the business! Anyway... that conversation was all I could think about as Melissa was getting me ready for the photo shoot!!! IT WAS ALL SO GIRLY, GIRL!... LOL... so not ME!... but I enjoyed every bit of it!!! My nails were HOT PINK... I got my BUSHY eyebrows arched... Mel made up my face... put my hair up in the coolest mohawk...and I wore the shortest skirt known to man... GIRLY, GIRL!!! lol... I felt soooo comfortable in that skirt though! That's a first! I HATE SKIRTS AND DRESSES!!!.. HATE IT... HATE IT... HATE IT!... but for some odd reason it didn't bother me to wear it...Maybe because I knew it was for the photo shoot... I wouldn't be caught dead in that skirt if I were just going out! But yea... MELISSA DID AN AMAZING JOB styling us! She is the bomb, man! I can't wait to see how God moves her! She's gonna do big things! I just know it!... We took the pics downtown on the bridge! Let me go back just a little... This photo shoot wasn't about me at all! Sabrina needed a model for her portfolio... to show that she can work with other people and still look extra FAB!!!... I'm not a model... Get it?!... ok moving on!... so yea The photographer's name was Ginger!!!... a sweetheart! She was good too!!... She seemed to like us!!!! Sabrina was sooo FREAKIN' FIERCE!... The girl is the bomb!!! I was shocked! I didn't know she was that good! I loved watching her!!! Me on the other hand... LOL... I think I did ok! It wasn't really about me so it didn't matter! but yea... Overall... it was a great photo shoot! Everything went smoothly and I think she got some good shots!.. We'll see when she sends us the pictures next week!!! Maybe I'll post a few... We'll see!!!! After that... my feet were hurting... and King Stomach was singing a song that I hadn't heard in awhile!... It was time...

... TO EAT!!!

The whole time we were downtown all I could think about was food!!! I was trying to do like Sabrina and not eat before the shoot... MIND YOU... the shoot was at 6:30! Y'ALL KNOW I DIDN'T DO THAT RIGHT?! lol... I showed up to Sabrina and Mel's at like 1:00 with two corn dogs and an oreo blast from Sonic... AT LEAST I ATE LIGHT, RIGHT?! lol My stomach was surprisingly very flat! Sabrina's strategy works... don't eat... IT'S HARD THOUGH... So when we were done with the shoot... I had to get some real food in my stomach! We went to Demo's!!! I had only been one time before and that was 4 years ago... I couldn't remember what it was like but I didn't really care! I WAS HUNGRY!! The wait was 40 minutes long! I DIDN'T THINK I WOULD MAKE IT! God did something cuz I made it! COME ON, SOMEBODY!!! We got a free appetizer... which was ok but I was hungry!... It didn't even matter... I ended up getting the Fettuccine Imperial! It was sooo good! It was basically a fettuccine alfredo with chicken, ham, and my favorite... MUSHROOMS!!! IT WAS SOOO GOOD! I LICKED THE PLATE CLEAN! lol... Well I left maybe a piece of chicken... which I could have eaten but I felt super fat after Melissa looked at my plate and BUCKED her eyes in amazement! lol... THEY SHOULD KNOW ME BY NOW! Anyway... I'm about to take a nap before I head to work!!!! I'm supposed to go to this two year old's birthday party but I don't think that's gonna happen!!!!

Until next time,

PCE!

LIFE CAN BE SO FRIKKIN' BLAH... ugh!

Mel Watkins told me yesterday that I was slackin with my blog!!! I told her that I haven't been happy lately... I can't blog if I'm not happy!!!... She told me that's when I'm supposed to write... UGH!!! BUT... I want people to laugh when they read my blog... NOT FEEL SORRY FOR ME... I hate pity parties... I feel more comfortable just dealing with it on my own... I don't trust a lot of people! Who knows what they would do or say if they knew what i was REALLY going through?!... BUT HERE I AM... BLOGGING... because it has become a part of my life... and I feel so good afterwards... so here it is... BLOG #17...

"DIARY OF A..."

DUDE!!!... Lately... I have been one bitter, unhappy MUG! (lol... remember that word?) It's been bad... I've been snapping on people for no reason!... Little stuff that people around me have been doing has been pissing me off!!!... I mean to the point that I just want to tell them about themselves!!!! SO NOT COOL... It's like I'm turning into my old self!!!... "THE OLD STIX" The old Stix didn't care one bit about your (in general) feelings or what you were going through... The old Stix would tell you about yourself in the rudest, most blunt way... and smile like she gave you the biggest compliment... The old Stix wasn't fake... if she didn't like you... YOU KNEW IT! I feel like I'm going back there! I just want to tell people about themselves... I just want to cut people out of my life and start over! I'M SO FRIKKIN' BITTER! This is not who I am.. God has delivered me!... Why am I going back?!... Why am I giving in?!... Where is my freakin' strength?!

I feel like I need to apologize to some people!!! If I've hurt any one's feelings or just had the worst attitude with you... PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!! I really didn't mean it... I have to learn how to deal with my frustration and my anger... You shouldn't have to suffer because I'm going through!!!!

and the list goes on...

In the last few days, I've been receiving random phone calls from my family telling me that I'm making bad decisions... and I need to come home!... My bills are literally PILING UP... My job sucks... I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING WITH MY MUSIC... My dad and I can't seem to talk without arguing!... I'VE HAD A HEADACHE THAT JUST WON'T GO AWAY!!!... and the list goes on... and on... AND FREAKIN' ON!!!! "IS THIS WHAT MY LIFE IS GOING TO BE LIKE?!... HOW THE HECK DID I GET HERE?!" These last few days have been hard... I've been working non stop and it is really doing a number on my body! It's not fun running around all day for hours with no break waiting on people! I really think it's time for me to transition out of there... "BUT TO WHERE, GOD?!" Where do You want me to go?... What should I be doing right now?! This is where my frustration lies... Do I go home?... Do I stay? JESUS, LORD! I CAN'T TAKE IT!... I'm literally fighting back tears right now... I don't like feeling like this!!! So SAINTS, KEEP ME IN YOUR PRAYERS!!!! It's much deeper than this... but because I'M SO FREAKIN' SECRETIVE... AND I CARE TOO MUCH ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK... I can't completely put it out there like I want!!! So just stand in agreement with me... That I will come out of this... That God is going to speak... and I won't be stuck... I KNOW THAT NONE OF THIS IS OF GOD... God doesn't operate in confusion... It's just not HIM... God doesn't want me to be angry.. IT IS JUST NOT WHO HE IS!!!

Maybe I'm just experiencing spiritual warfare... LORD GIVE ME THE STRENGTH TO HANDLE IT! My mentor keeps telling me to stay focused... She doesn't really know what I'm going through... but maybe the enemy is trying to distract me... and keep me from focusing on what God wants to do for me spiritually before I take off for Jamaica!... WHO KNOWS... I'm kind of tired of trying to figure it out!!!!!...

This blog is so freakin' depressing, MAN!.. This is so not me... I gotta come out of this... and FAST!

IN OTHER NEWS...

My photo shoot was yesterday!... I'll probably talk about it later today!!! yea... I will!!!! I need to get myself together before work!!!!

Until next time,

PCE!

So much to say... NOT ENOUGH TIME!!!!

DDDUUUDDEE!!! I haven't done this in forever!!!!! I've been working like crazy lately and haven't had the time to blog!!! I've missed it sooo much! I really enjoy doing this!!!... just wait until I get a video camera!!! You guys are gonna see more cool blogs!!!!

WHAT DO I WANT TO SAY?!

UGH!!... IDK!!! So much has happened.... I met Cece Winans for the second time, I've been hanging out with "the group" almost daily... I COULDN'T DRIVE MY TRUCK FOR LIKE 3 DAYS... what the heck?!... MICHAEL JACKSON DIED!!!! :(... My friends and I went to Atlanta for a day... good times!!!.... The BET AWARDS SUCKED!!!... I think I'm in love with Maxwell!!!... Someone made the second payment on my trip... LOOK AT GOD!!!!!!!... I have a photo shoot with, Moma Sabrina Friday!!... super excited!!! I wonder if I can wear a boyfriend blazer and a cute fluffy skirt or something... AAAUUUNNTTTIIIE MELISSA!? lol AS YOU CAN SEE THAT IS A TOTAL OF 9 BLOGS that I have missed out on!!! Not cool!!!! It's ok though!...

WHAT THE HECK DO I WANT TO TALK ABOUT?!

OOOhhh... while I think about it... Guess what I'm eating?!... give up?!.. left overs from Sunday! lol... That sounds kind of gross, huh?!... IT'S STILL GOOD! Darius took me to J. Alexander's for dinner Sunday!!! It was good! I decided to do something different and NOT order chicken fingers and fries!!!! Instead I ordered the Grilled Pork Tenderloin, cured in-house with Thai "BANG BANG" sauce, and Smashed Potatoes!!!! OMG!!!... FRIKKIN' AMAZING! It was sooo good! I really could have finished it there... but our server was new and kept coming over like every two seconds!!! When she offered to box it up I went ahead and said, "Yes" very politely too... cuz Lord knows I just about went off on her because I wanted to finish!!! But LOOK AT GOD... Now I can eat it today!!! COME ON, SOMEBODY!!!! :)

I GOT IT!!!

Finally... I know what I want to talk about!!! So... Yesterday I worked a double!!!!... I was working with some of my favorite people so it wasn't that hard! We had a lot of fun... even though it was SLOW AS CRAP IN THERE!!!!... My boy, Braxton was there!!! I love him so much, guys!!! He is soooo talented! He and another guy I work with, Bret... (who I think is my husband! He is sooo cute!!! AND HE PLAYS A MEEAAANNN GUITAR! LOVE HIM)... started a band called Furiosity9! Click on their name to see their myspace page!!!... and disregard their layout! lol... They're men... pray for them!!!! I'M LIKE THEIR NUMBER ONE FAN!!!! lol And they know it! Braxton writes the songs, is lead vocalist, and plays the guitar... HE IS AN AMAZING SONG-WRITER!!!... and he and Bret put the music together! Bret is the lead guitarist! They also have a drummer and a bass player! The bass player also sings... he sings the harmony parts! I got the opportunity to meet the other two last night! Cool dudes!!!! Let me go back... I LOVE BANDS!!!... ALL KINDS!!!! LIVE MUSIC IS WHAT I LIVE FOR!!! I'm a ROCKSTAR... I CAN'T HELP IT!!! lol Anyway... so Braxton invited me to their practice last night! I was sooo excited!!! That's all I could think about at work that night!!! As soon as I got off... I headed to their house! I've been to their house a lot of times so it was nothing to get there!!!! So there I was.... sitting there... taking in Braxton's voice.... Bret's amazing solos.... THE TIGHTEST BASS LINE I'VE HEARD IN AWHILE... and THE SICKEST DRUMS, DUDE!!! I was feeling it!!! And though they are SO FAR from being a christian band... I WENT IN!!!! lol The music was almost too much for me!!!! I'm serious! The boys are amazing!!!! I can't wait to go to their gig next week!!!! I learned the chorus to each song soooo fast! I'm gonna be like a little groupie at their show! I'm excited!!!! Dude... They were working on endings to their songs... I think I know why Blu21 struggles with that... WE HAVE NO DRUMMER!!! The drums really are who the depend on for their endings!!! I can't really explain it!!! But... all i know is... WE NEED A DRUMMER!!! I ended up leaving a little early because I really wanted to play!!! lol... I felt sooo inspired!!!! I got home and DIDN'T PLAY!!! lol... I prayed instead!!!...

"I PRAY, YOU PRAY, WE PRAY!!!"-CeCe Winans lol

As I headed home, my homie, Renee called me!!!! I love her, guys!!! She is one of my closest friends!!!...really!!! I was telling her about some stuff that I was struggling with...Relationally!!!... and what do you know, THE GIRL HAD ALREADY BEEN THROUGH THAT! See, God knows just who to send you!!! She helped me out sooo much!!!! And what I love the most about her... she told me things that kind of hurt!!! lol... She told me what I needed to hear instead of what I wanted to hear! NOW THAT'S A REAL FRIEND!!!! She said only what God had given her... and what's funny is that my mentor had already said some of the same things!!!... Like I've said before... If it is from God, YOU WILL HEAR IT AGAIN!!!! TRUST!!! Anway... We talked for about 45 minutes or so and she had to go... she had to work that night!!!!! She encouraged me to pray...and I did just that!!!! It felt good talking to God again! I really haven't been giving Him the time He deserves... and guess what... He has still been doing amazing things for me!!! HE DESERVES SOOO MUCH!!! I'm gonna do better!!!!

Anway... I need to get ready for DOUBLE #2... for the week!!!

Until next time,

PCE!

"GOD, I LOVE YOU!!!!"

"GOD HEARS EVERYTHING!!!!"- RENEE

DUDE!!! I can't say it enough... I LOVE GOD... AND I LOVE THE FRIENDS HE HAS BLESSED ME WITH!!!! I'm so serious... THEY ARE SOOO FROM God!!!...

I've been a member of Born Again for about 7 months now and God finally answered my prayer! It couldn't have come at a better time! When I first joined, it seemed like the only people I knew were older women!... I'm talkin' like between the ages of 35 and like 50 something!... Don't get me wrong I love them all and I know God has placed them in my life... but I wanted more! I prayed that God would send me people my age from that church... not just anybody... but people that I could hang out with that LOVE GOD... the way I LOVE GOD!!!! People that I could hang out with who could find fun things to do outside of the club!!! Ya know?! The first friend that He sent me was Renee!!!! We met in my new member's orientation! I tell her all the time that I know God placed her in my life! She reminds me so much of myself! She is always trying to find more ways to please God!... She's a worshipper and she genuinely loves God!!!... I LOVE IT!!!! HER BIRTHDAY IS IN SEPTEMBER TOO... There are 2 other people that God sent into my life that I prayed for... AND THEY ARE BORN IN SEPTEMBER TOO!!! lol... Isn't that cool?! And then came AJ, Sabrina, Melissa, Sophie... but you know that story already!... Let me tell you about tonight...

***ToNiGhT!!!!***

After bible study Renee thought it would be a good idea to cook and hangout!!! She has been wanting to come to my apartment for awhile so she said she would come over... I can't remember how exactly all the plans came about... but we decided that we were gonna cook breakfast and chill at my apartment!! We told Sabrina and the crew and everybody was game! You know I had to stop by Aj's to see if she wanted to come! I could have called her but my phone was dead so I stopped by really fast and told her what was going on! She had to do her hair, but she said she would stop by for a minute! I met up with Renee at Kroger... by the time I got there... she was already done!!! I grabbed some plates, forks, cups and checked out!... We headed back to my crib and she and Anjelica cooked!!! We had pancakes, turkey sausage, eggs, oatmeal, biscuits, and orange juice.... (THE BOMB.COM!!!!! as Aj would say) what better way to top it off than with WORSHIP!!! LOL... We watched Ce Ce Winan's dvd... " Live in the Throne Room!"... ALL OF MY FRIENDS ARE CECE FANS... see... Another sign that God sent them my way... LOL... not really but hey... IT'S A PLUS!!!! It was great watching that again... It had been a minute!!!!! After we watched that we chilled for a mintue then AJ and Melissa left!!!! OH YEA... AJ CAME!!! I really didn't think she was gonna come! I was so glad she came!!!! That's my dawg, man! LOVE HER...

THEN IT HAPPENED...

I learned how to play one of my favorite worship songs the other day, "Pour my love on you!" I let Anjelica hear it a few days later... She added a really cool ending to it and a transition into the song I wrote called, "God I love you!" Jelly wanted Sabrina to hear it so she asked me to come over so we could do it!!! To be honest, I wasn't in the mood to play! (Gotta put myself out there... before Jelly does!) lol I had started cleaning the kitchen and I kind of wanted to finish while I was in the mood... (Anjelica is cleaning the kitchen now... lol see what I mean)... So I stopped cleaning and we played the song for Sabrina, Sophie, and Renee!!!! MAN!!!!! I WISH I COULD HAVE GOTTEN IT ON TAPE!!!! Once we got to the first line, "GOD I LOVE YOU" everybody went in!!! MAN IT WAS GOOD!!!... The song is so simple... so personal... so PERFECT! I love that song... not because I wrote it (I never intended for anyone to hear it) but because IT'S SUCH A PERFECT SONG TO WORSHIP TO!!!! It could go on forever... like Lambchop's song!!! lol Anjelica started... and then Sophie asked if she could join!!! LORD JESUS!!! I already told you this girl LOVES THE LORD!!!!... SHE IS SOOO A WORSHIPPER!!!... She went in and her words were perfect... so intimate!!!! No one else was in the room!... It was just her and God... and then I forgot anyone was in the room! It was like I was playing... but Sophie was on the radio or something... lol I could hear her.. but she SO wasn't there! It was just me and God! I could feel Him... WHAT A SWEET VISIT IT WAS!... and then I heard Sabrina! That girl doesn't give herself enough credit! She can really sing! and her words were powerful as well!!!! We all were right there at the feet of Jesus... just worshipping!!! Me and Jelly on the guitar... Sophie, Sabrina, and Jelly singing, and Renee making a beat on the carpet! IT WAS PERFECT! GOD WAS PLEASED!!!!! I really wish we could have recorded it but then again I don't... That was for God... I'm learning that some things are meant for just me and God! I can't let everyone hear what I play to God because then it wouldn't be special anymore! Just like tonight... we all worshipped together and we can't even remember what all was said... When we heard it... IT WAS PERFECT... we all were in agreement... BUT ONCE IT WAS OVER... IT WAS GONE!!! That's how you know it was JUST FOR GOD!!! Man, it was perfect!!!... special... our gift to Him! I enjoyed every bit of it!!!!!

"GOD, I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!... GOD, I WANT YOU!!!!!! GOTTA HAVE YOU!!!!... I'M NOTHING WITHOUT YOU... INCOMPLETE WITHOUT YOU!!!!!"

I'm off to bed now...

Until next time,

PCE!

Lesson Learned...

My friends are awesome!!!!

Ok!!!! First of all I SHOULD NOT be awake right now!!!! I sooo have to be at work in the morning...! I'm at Sabrina's apartment with Anjelica and AJ! We were just watching Tye Tribbett's live recording of the Victory album... STRAIGHT UP BLESSED MY LIFE!!!! I LOVE TYE TRIBBETT SOOO MUCH... He straight up does not care when He worships!!!... and HE IS SOOO GENUINE!!! I LOOK UP TO HIM!!!.. One day I'm gonna let go like that... GOD DESERVES IT!!!!... I HAVE to get over caring what people think! God DESERVES MY BEST PRAISE... AND HE'S GONNA GET IT!!!! lol... Isn't it weird how I talk about how I WANT to worship God but I can't do it! I have some serious issues!!!! lol... Pray For me!!! Ok... so anyway... I have to tell this!!! I HAVE THE COOLEST FRIENDS EVER!! We all are the BIGGEST HOLY ROLLERS...EVER! lol I KNOW God placed them in my life!!!... Why did one of my friends ( I won't even call her out right now... lol) STRAIGHT UP go into woship on Tye Tribbett's song "I STILL HAVE JOY!!"... I'm talkin' about SHOUTIN' LIKE SHE WAS AT CHURCH ON A SUNDAY MORNING!!!! LMBO... I LOVE IT!!!! I laughed at first because I thought she was playing but when I realized how SERIOUS she was... I couldn't help but be happy for her!!! God WAS SOOO PLEASED! I just know it!!! I know she got her breakthrough!!!... lol in an apartment at like 12 something in the morning!!!! SEE... GOTTA LOVE MY FRIENDS!!!! LOL

Blu 21 Update...

Ok... Let me go ahead and get this out of the way!!! OUR GIG... LORD JESUS I'M LATE... That was a LESSON!!! I can't even go into detail because it is sooo long ago, but God definitely showed me some things! Man... BLU21 is definitely anointed... and God definitely wants to do some things through us... but we have to put in the work! We haven't been doing that and I think it showed at this gig! Our endings sucked... my guitar was out of tune (this little boy kicked it over when he was on stage before we performed)... I could go on and on! But you want to know the cool thing... God STILL SHOWED UP!... People were still blessed by our music... NOTHING BUT GOD! I was sooo upset with our performance until I heard that! That's definitely what we were there for... BUT I promise you... I will never ever do another gig that way again though... I believe that God wants to use us as His vessel... GOD OPERATES IN EXCELLENCE... therefore my music will BE EXCELLENT... God deserves to use the best... And I want to be HIS BEST!... LESSON LEARNED!!!...

Speaking of learning lessons...

God has defintely been testing me a lot lately... my faith... my strength... how I love! God is trying to do some things through me! I can tell! It hasn't been fun or easy though! I've failed some test... LOL... and taking a few over!... But it's all good though... because I know ONCE I get through this... He is gonna use me!!! YEEEESSSSS!!!!! I'm excited!!! USE ME LORD!!!!

CHURCH WAS SOOO GOOD TODAY... And if God didn't speak through Elder Pete today... LORD, JESUS!!!! He was straight up stepping on my toes! Coming from Acts chapter 9, He talked about Saul's conversion!!! If you haven't read it... You should read it! I love that story... Later on in the story at verses 23-25 it talks about how the Jews were out to kill him... When Saul figured out their plan, his followers lowered him in a basket over a wall one night so he could get away. So anyway... the name of his sermon was "Hold on to the rope" or something like that... "Hold the rope"... UGH... Idk... that is bothering me now... but anyway... He talked about how we have to stop leaving our brothers and sisters behind... We have to hold on and don't give up on them! You never know who you are holding on to... They may be another Saul... another Jesus... just waiting to save the world... but if we let them go, they will never get to do what God has created them to do!!! MAN... IF HE DIDN'T STEP ON MY TOES!!! lol... I need to go back and pick up a rope or two...! I know I have left some people behind... but thanks to today's sermon... I'm going back to get them... Let's just PRAY they haven't fallen to the bottom! :) God is sooo good!... and to think... I wasn't gonna go to church today!!!!

JAMAICA, MON!

Ok... FINALLY! The women's ministry at my church, FIHI (Fashioned In His Image) is planning a mission trip to Jamaica in August! Basically we are going to minister to the young people at a camp in Chapelton! I'm sooo excited! First of all... I LOVE KIDS!!!! I have this weird passion for them! lol... I could spend all day with a kid and lose track of the time!!!... so to know that I'm going there to be around kids is exciting! I was told that they are very stand offish at first... but that doesn't scare me! I love the challenge! I am looking forward to ministering to them! I LOVE GOING ON MISSION TRIPS! I've been on 4... this is my first one out of the country!!!! It has been awhile since I've been on one... and Lord knows I've been dying to go on another! I'm super excited... I still don't know how I'm going to pay for it... but I'm not worried about it... because GOD KNOWS!! I was able to make the first payment... so I'm believing that He is going to come through for the next 2 payments!!!!! Pray for and with me as I prepare to go! I want to go mentally, physically, emotionally, and of course spiritually prepared for what God has in store! I can't wait to blog about what all God is gonna do while I'm there!!!! THE TESTIMONIES ARE GOING TO BE THE BOMB.COM!!!! LOL

Ok... I'm soooo about to go to sleep!!! I have to work in the morning!!!!!... and it's freakin' 2am!!!! Gotta go!!!

Until next time,

PCE!

Lately...

WWWHHHAATTTS UPPPPPPP!!!

It's been a minute and I have absolutely NO excuse this time!... so I'm going to stop making them!!! lol I believe this blog is going to be filled with PURE RANDOMNESS... like the utmost RANDOMEST blog ever!!!!! I know I made that up! HA!

TODAY...

was pretty cool! I went to the OG and worked 'til about 5! I had plans to work a double but I made pretty good money and decided not to!

My friend Renee and I text pretty much every day and today she told me that she was going to a church event! I told her I would go too. We are members of the same church, Born Again Ministries! B.A.C. has a pretty cool College and Young Adult ministry.This summer they are having this cool hangout type thing on Mondays... It's called, "College and Young Adult CONNECTIONS!" This was my first one and I must say... IT WAS PRETTY DARN COOL!!! It was about 11 of us there... I knew maybe 5 of them! lol Everyone was super cool and ARE SOOO ON FIRE FOR GOD!!! It was great being around them! I love meeting people my age who are on fire for God!!! I THINK IT'S SOOO COOL!!! Anyway... The minister over our ministry is Minister Reggie Madison! He is super cool... a really laid back guy! I enjoy listening to him teach! He is SO REAL!... I look forward to hearing him teach more.... Yea... so We just talked and ATE... well I didn't eat... I had just eaten at work so I was still pretty full... I KNOW RIGHT?!... so not like me! I heard it was pretty good though! One of the mothers at the church made it!!! I KEEP GETTING OFF TOPIC... anyway... Minister Reggie read from Daniel 1... He focused on Daniel and the three Hebrew boys! Those guys were DIE HARD followers of God!!! They believed in no other way... They stood up for what they believed... no matter what... THEY FEARED THE LORD... They didn't fear the king!!! Even when the king told them to do something... if it didn't line up with God's will, they didn't do it!!! THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN' 'BOUT! Great examples!!... so yea... We talked about every day situations on a college campus and how we should stand out the same way! Of course it's not always easy... We touched on that as well!!! It was good... I didn't really talk much! I guess I was just getting a feel for everyone! I said what I needed to say and was done... I wasn't really giving testimonies or talking for forever... I simply answered a question or two and listened to everyone else... I was asked to be on the commercial for the website! That was pretty cool! I'm a little nervous about seeing myself though!

LATELY...

God is definitely in the BLESSING BUSINESS!!! lol He has allowed me to meet some of the coolest people EVER!!!!... all cool in their own little way!!! "I'm gonna try out this whole picture on a blog thing... Let's see how I do..." ANYWAY... Ok... God SO put them in my life... these three girls all go to my church. I knew them all from a distance but now we are like COOL! lol I LOVE IT!...

I can't remember how I met them exactly but I remember Sabrina speaking to me randomly after church one Sunday. From then on she would compliment my outfit or just say hello! She was really sweet!... Well, recently she has been reading my blogs... and read about my band!!!! Come to find out... THIS GIRL LOVES MUSIC TOO!!! SHE WRITES SONGS, Y'ALL!!! What a gift! Well... She wrote a song for the kids in Jamaica (still gotta write about that trip)... and asked if I would put music to it!!!! I felt so DARN honored or something... I can't really describe the feeling but I know happy was somewhere in there!!!... not just because she asked me to do that... but because I knew that was what God wanted me to do! He had already told me that I was going to write a song for the trip... and that the kids would sing it... I just didn't know how... GOD KNOWS I CAN'T WRITE... See how God works?! HE'S SO AWESOME.. I keep trying to tell y'all!!! lol So last week we worked on the song... It's turning out pretty good! I'm excited about it! I can actually hear the kids singing it! Sabrina did an awesome job on it! So yea... after each session we would chill and it's been fun! THIS GIRL IS SOOO HILARIOUS!!!! FUNNY... FUNNY... FUNNY, I TELL YOU!!! I LOVE HER!

Melissa is one of her roommates. SHE IS SOOOO COOL... when I say cool... I guess I mean calm... ABOUT EVERYTHING!!! I LOVE IT! lol... HER BLOGS ARE FREAKIN AMAZING TOO... http://fabglancenashville.blogspot.com/ CHECK IT OUT!!! I don't know how I learned about her blog... but when I saw it... I was even more excited about blogging... For some odd reason I wrote on her facebook wall and told her how awesome I thought her blogs were and SHE STARTED READING MINE!!! AWESOME! lol She's so nice! So yea... I got a chance to get to know her... and SHE'S HILARIOUS... Her sense of humor is like nobody I know!... and I know some pretty funny people! She's super duper smart... AND AN AMAZING STYLIST!!!!!... She's soooo gonna be my stylist when I make it big!!!... OH AND SHE CAN COOK!!! Yep... You know she's a favorite, right?! lol DON'T YOU JUST LOVE THAT PIC!!! LOL... IT'S MY FAV!

Sophie is another one of her roommates!!! DUDE... SHE IS SOOO SWEET!!! lol She is one of the worship leaders at my church!!!! I love her spirit! She's sooo kind... sweet...! Idk... I can't explain it! You can definitely see the "JESUS" in her! She has the most beautiful voice!... She'll take you straight to the feet of Jesus with her voice!!!! lol I'M SOOO SERIOUS! She is sooo passionate about God!... Her love for God is sooo sincere and genunine!!! SHE LOVES HER SOME GOD! I LOVE THAT!!! I noticed that before I even had the opportunity to talk to her! When I met her... it was like meeting a celebrity!... and She was soooo nice! I didn't expect that... I don't think I expected her to be mean... I just didn't think she would be so warm!!!! I hope that people feel that when they meet me! lol I want to be that warm! I felt so comfortable around her... Anyway... I don't want to sound weird... so I'm gonna stop! She's super cool though! DUDE... SHE CALLED ME JESSE!!! I ABSOLUTELY HATE THAT!!!... but when she said it... IT WAS OK! lol SHE IS THE ONLY PERSON ALLOWED TO CALL ME THAT! It doesn't even bother me...! HA! HOW WEIRD!!!! lol... She also helped me... She may never know it though... I was struggling with the fact that I met Darius online... I would get so embarrassed when people would ask how we met... Well... She and her boyfriend met on the internet!!!! AND SHE IS SOOO OK WITH THAT!!! God uses different resources to help us find our mate... She helped me see that!!! THANK YOU GOD... and SOPHIE!!! lol

AREN'T THEY JUST ADORABLE?! I wish you guys could hang out with them!!! Everybody needs to know them! LOL!!

This is FUN!!!..

Ok... while I'm at it... How about I introduce you to the other two girls that I talk about a lot!!! First...

MY SIS... MY BESTIE... MY ROOMIE... BAND MEMBER... JELLY!!!! I've talked about her before... This is my girl!!! We haven't even known each other that long but I feel like I've known her forever!!!! I love her like a sister!!! We have a real SISTER relationship too!!! lol... She understands me... I understand her... She gets on my nerves... I get on hers... She knows ALLLL my business... i know hers... YOU GET IT RIGHT?! lol I thank God for her... I really do... She can sing too!!! Her voice is very unique!!!! I LOVE IT!!!!... SO DIFFERENT! She has a blog spot as well... CHECK IT OUT... SHE'S SOOO FREAKIN' SMART... AND SHE IS STRAIGHT PREACHIN'... lol well teachin'!!! She knows that Word now!!!...http://call-me-jel.blogspot.com/

SAVING THE BEST FOR LAST... A TRUE GODSEND...

MY HOMIE... AAAA JJJJJ KKKEEEZZZYYYY!!!! (AJ KEYS!)... I'm serious! I love this girl so much!!!! She's like my twin... only she is like 2 years older than me!!! I met her through Anjelica actually! She is a cousin of one of Anjelica's friends. We thought she was a potential Blu21 member... She loves God and wants to use her talent to GLORIFY HIM... JUST LIKE US!!! Turns out that isn't the plan God has for her... which is totally ok because I know God has BIGGER and BETTER things in store for her! She is sooo talented!!!! God wants to do so much through her music... I can't wait to see how He does it! So anyway... I would text and check on her... minister to her every now and then... go by and see her... that kind of thing!!!... and wah lah.... voila!! (lol... UGH!) WE ARE SUPER COOL!!! I've gotten to know her so well! Here lately, she's been ministering to me about some things!!!! She is soooo intelligent too!!!! Man!!! Oh and we pretty much have the same sense of style!!!... which is pretty cool!!! God knew what He was doing when He sent her my way. She's turned out to be an amazing friend!!!! :) Oh... check out her blog too... http://justcallmerohzi.blogspot.com/!... IT'LL CHANGE YOUR LIFE!!! The girl's life is pretty darn interesting!!! lol

**KEYS IS SOOO NOT HER LAST NAME, BTW!!! She plays the keyboard... Alicia KEYS... get it?!**

OK! I think I've said enough tonight!!!!!! I guess I'll find something else to do before I go to bed!!!! Next time I'm gonna talk about our last gig and my trip to Jamaica!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Until next time,
PCE!