Just an update...

Ok... It's been a minute. I haven't had anything interesting to blog about. I still don't...lol... but reading AJ's blogs have me wanting to blog!!! Her blogs have been the bomb lately. Shoot! I'm ready for her book to come out!... HURRY UP, AJ!!!

Anyway...

Since I don't have anything interesting to blog about... How about I just update you on a few things!!! I hope I don't bore you too much!

2009 or 2010?!

So, a couple of blogs ago I was sooo excited about this new year. lol... and I still am... but I'm ready to see some changes, LORD! I do realize that change doesn't happen over night and we are just entering the new year... but umm... a *little* change would be nice! lol I'm not complaining, really.... just ready for something new!

My rent wasn't on time this month!... DANG IT! I was really hoping that January would be the start of me paying my rent ON TIME!!! My first check was pretty small... it was just about half of my rent. I didn't expect that at all because I've been working at my new job for about a month now. I found out that my job pays on a two week delay or something like that. I was so confused when I heard that. I had NO CLUE what it meant! I just KNEW I would be ballin' out of control with this check... lol... I had made plans to pay my rent and car note... ON TIME... and do a few other things!! Nope... didn't happen. I'm not worried about it... I know the months ahead will be different. That just took me by surprise!

I'm not going back to school this semester! :(... See... 2010 is NOT the business so far. My step dad was supposed to get some kind of bonus... and that was what he was going to use to help me pay for the 14 hours that I need to get my financial aid back for my last semester. (whoa... can you say RUN-ON! that was a mouth full, huh?!) That didn't work out as planned. When I received that news, I was soooo upset! I hate not being in school. I feel like such a failure... I was in the bed for like 2 days... hating my life! Thank God for Jeremy and my mentor... who cared enough to keep calling... and texting despite my attempts to ignore them! I love you guys! I'm SEMI over it now. It is what it is... and I know that I'm going to finish. I hate when MY timing doesn't line up with God's though! UGH!!... Keep me in your prayers! ;) k?!

What else is going on?!

Other than that... Life is grand! ;) I still love my job. It's really easy... I'm finally used to the hours... I just had to find something to do to occupy my time while I wasn't working. Right now it's the bible and Grey's Anatomy Season 5! Pretty cool job, huh?!

Jeremy and I are doing great. We are yet learning more and more about each other. That has been a journey. I have all kinds of walls up that Jeremy is doing his best to tear down. Poor thing! Lol... I wish I wasn't so complicated! He's so loving and patient though! Gotta love him! I'm learning how to go with the flow and put my guard down. My last REAL relationship ended very badly... and as a result... I've become very controlling of how things will happen in this one... For instance, I told Jeremy in the beginning that we would NOT put that we were in a relationship with each other on facebook. In the last relationship... I did that and whenever we argued facebook knew all about it. lol Facebook knew i was out of a relationship before I did! It was so embarrassing!... I hated having to explain what was going on to people... and then explain myself again when I took him back... I didn't want Jeremy and I to have pictures up of each other on there either... I realized that all of this was unfair to him. He is very excited about this relationship, so am I, and he has every right to want to flaunt our relationship to the world. I can't allow what happened in my past relationships to affect what's going on in ours! That's been an interesting lesson.... So right now... I have a pic of us on my profile... and I just confirmed Jeremy's request to be his girlfriend on facebook! It's hard, but I'm happy with this decision! I'm growing... lol... I like it! HA!

Communication is another thing I'm learning to do. I thought I had that down... UM... NO! lol I love when I can talk to him about something I didn't agree with concerning HIM... and He does a great job of taking that... and changing it for the next time! Me on the other hand... lol... I HATE when he does it!!!! It's hard hearing what he doesn't like or what bothers him about me...and me having to turn it around and change it!... Let's just say in the past... I would say, "IF YOU CAN'T DEAL WITH ME, THEN LEAVE!"... a CHILD! As much as I hate hearing it, I'm learning to GROW UP and take a look at myself. He's right most of the time anyway... and when I don't agree...I just brush it off and "keep it moving." He's entitled to his opinion and I kind of prefer for him to tell me in that moment rather than keep it bottled up and it turn into something big later! ;)

So yea... So far... so good!!! We've only been together OFFICIALLY since September and it's already been a cute little baby roller coaster! I'm excited about the months ahead!

Umm... church?!

I think I've pretty much caught you guys up on what's going on! See... not interesting!... So moving right a long to my day... I will only share a portion of it.

Church was THE BOMB today! I woke up late but still made plans to go to Born Again despite my tardiness. It wasn't until I was headed that way that I decided to go to my "get away" church! LOL... (Jeremy hates when I call it that!... and he hates it even more that I feel the need to go to another church every now and then!) I'm so glad I went. It was God's PLAN for me to be there! ;) I was there in enough time to enjoy a hot chocolate AND spend time in God's presence in the soaking room before service started. I swear it's like a HIGH CLASS hotel for worshippers in that place!! I LOVE IT! I have to limit myself to one Sunday a month... any more than that and my butt will be a member. Ok... confession... I go there on Mondays and Wednesdays sometimes... but I only attend one SUNDAY a month! lol

Praise and Worship!!!... WORDS CAN'T DESCRIBE HOW GREAT IT WAS! That's expected at that church though! The sermon !!!....ON POINT! The pastor was sick so a minister of the church and his wife preached. They did a tag team sermon about their transition from Canada to the U.S. It was all God's plan! I learned a lot from that sermon. To sum it all up, it was about lining your life... your actions... your walk... with God's plan. It's time out for games... and it's time to walk in purpose! It was sooo on point for me. That's EXACTLY where I am right now. I just want my walk to be in line with God's purpose for me. I'm tired of just going with the flow! SHOOT! Ever since this new year started I've been thinking about the little things I need to do to prepare myself for where I believe God wants to take me! I love when the sermon is sooo FOR ME!!

As I was preparing to leave... literally walking out of my row... I was stopped by a man who I had never seen before. He told me that I had beautiful eyes... and then began to share how beautiful he thought I was. It freaked me out a little... and he could tell! lol... He wasn't just talking about it from a physical perspective though.... He started to share how it connected spiritually... Elder Harold had shared that with me before... It was really weird to hear it again. That man, Bill was his name... I think, began to share a lot more with me... too much to type! I literally had chills!...and I immediately felt God's presence! NO LIE!! I try not to be super spiritual and say... "I HEAR GOD" all the time... or "God chills with me on the regular"... lol because I'm still unsure of all that... but I KNOW God was there...! It was an amazing experience! After speaking with him...I sat back down and wrote down everything I could remember and went on about my business... and so did he! I don't know if I'll ever see that man again, but I'm so grateful for his boldness and obedience to the Holy Spirit. Today I walked with so much confidence after that... I was like, "God loves me!" lol.. It was a good day!

So yea... that's STIX right now! Still growing... still learning!!! Living life!... WITH PURPOSE! You coming with me!? ;)

I'm out for now...

Until next time,

P-ce!

oh yea... still wanna know?

PROBABLY NOT...

but I don't care!!! lol

I didn't tell you guys what Jeremy got me for Christmas!!! ;) 3 gifts... are you ready?!

1.) ART KIT:

He bought different paints and paintbrushes so we could decorate my guitar case! I said that I wanted to do that a while ago... Can't believe he remembered! We started on it last night! It's looking good! I'll post a pic of the final result! ;)

2.) INDIA ARIE DVD:

He has no idea... but I was on ebay years ago looking at everything that was posted concerning INDIA ARIE! lol... I love her... in case you didn't know! There was a dvd on the list of India Arie in Brazil... singing and learning all about the culture! I wanted it so bad... but never bought it... and never thought anything of it! I never shared it with anyone... I don't think! WHY WAS THAT THE DVD THAT JEREMY GOT ME?! PERFECT!!!!

It gets better... keep reading!!

3.) CONCERT TICKETS:

I'm going to see JOHN MAYER with my baby on February 10th !!! I'M SOOOO HAPPY!!!!! I can't wait! I hear that one of my friends helped him out with that one!!! THANK YOU SABRINA!!!! You're the bomb!!!

So there it is guys, a MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

Until next time,

P-ce

Finally... a NEW year!!!!

I know what you're thinking.... Those come around every year!!! Well, not for me!!! Every year I walk into another year HYPE and with resolutions that I know I will never stick to. I walk in with the same hopes, doing the same things, and not seeing any results. I don't think I've ever had a NEW YEAR! Well this year is different. It's my NEW year! I'm not walking in with bogus resolutions that I will only stress out trying to keep!! This year I'm doing one thing and one thing only!... TRUSTING GOD COMPLETELY! He gets my ALL this year!... and the rest will just flow. Our theme at church this year is "REACHING OUR WORLD FOR CHRIST." I'm doing just that! I believe God is gonna do great things... and I'm going to share those things with MYworld! Our God is too amazing to just keep Him to myself! LOL... I'm on another level... and I'm excited about it! THIS IS MY YEAR, DUDE!!... I can feel it!

2009 was by far the worst year of my life... but for some reason I can't even muster up the energy to go into detail about it. It's in the past... I've learned my lesson and I'm moving forward! Let's just say that I lost track... got distracted... and made the decision to do everything MY way!... without any reliance on God! BIG MISTAKE... and as a result... I went through HELL and HIGH WATER!!! I straight up drowned... and God came to my rescue! At the very end of the year, I could see the light! LOL I could see things turning around. I have a new job, a car I can afford, and I'm focused. I'm happy... I have peace... and I trust God! These things are what are helping me go into this NEW year with gladness! The blessings that came at the end of the year are going to trickle into 2010. The blessings aren't going to stop! LOL... I'm believing God for better days... and I know that people will be saved by my TESTIMONY!!

So blog followers, family, and friends... IT'S TIME TO STEP OUR GAME UP! I'm already there... I'm moving forward and I want you to come with me.... BUT JUST KNOW...that I'm not waiting on anybody! I'm not allowing anybody to take me down with them this year! If you're not coming with me, I'll pray for you and "keep it moving" as my friend, Mel, would say! lol

So... YOU READY?!... LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Until next time,
P-ce!

So far...

::....SO GOOD!!!....::

Well, here it is 8:00pm Christmas night and i'm actually doing a lot better than I thought. I'm spending my first Christmas away from home. I must admit... I thought I wasn't going to make it. But thanks to the best boyfriend in the WORLD and his welcoming family, I almost feel like I'm at home! ;)... Let me start with Christmas Eve...

On Christmas Eve, I went with them to a restaurant by TSU called The Garden Cafe where I had the best omelette of my life!!! I really enjoyed myself. I choked up a little because his family is sooo much like mine. Time spent with them reminded me of home wayyyy more than I anticipated thinking about it. At this point, I knew I was gonna be one depressed MUG on Christmas. His family was very sweet. They did everything they could to make me feel comfortable. After spending some more time with Jeremy at his uncle's house...I was off to work! My shift wasn't bad at all. Not as busy as I thought it would be... I actually did my hair and watched a Christmas movie while I monitored the phone. lol

::....Ok... back to today....::

This morning I received a million phone calls from my mom, my sisters, grandparents, cousins... pretty much everybody wishing me a Merry Christmas and telling me how much they missed and wished I were there! I actually made it through every call without crying. I couldn't believe it. My sis, Kennedi, was the first to call at 5AM... telling me to wake up...as if I were home. lol She wakes up early every Christmas!!! She's a lot like I was on Christmas... Just so freakin' anxious! I was glad she called. It made me feel like I was home... so I went back to sleep... PHONE WOKE ME UP... talked about home... went back to sleep... Finally at 10am when Jeremy's sister called I decided that I needed to get up. NO SLEEPING IN FOR ME! lol Jeremy called a few minutes later and told me to start getting ready so he could come and get me... I was gonna spend some time with him and his family before heading to work. Jeremy has been doing everything in his power to make sure I'm enjoying myself while I'm away. He's my favorite! lol

Once we arrived at his mom's house, everyone was getting ready to head to Jeremy's aunt and uncle's. Their ENTIRE FAMILY spends the night there on Christmas! That tradition is A LOT like one of mine back home... only everyone stays at my house on Christmas EVE and we wake up together on Christmas. Well anyway... I watched TV with his sisters and then I got a text from my mom!!!.... It was for Jeremy's mom!!! It said, " Show this to Jeremy's mom: Hello. I can't wait to meet you. Your son is the perfect gentleman and I know that it is because of our God in you. Thank you for being the host family for my baby. This is the first year she hasn't been with me for Christmas but it makes it easier knowing she is with a loving family. Thank you and Merry Christmas." I decided to read it to her because my phone is lame... little... and jacked up. I just knew I would be fine... and then I choked up! LOL... It hit me guys... I WANTED TO BE WITH MY MOMMY! :( ugh!! I tried to hide how I really felt but his mom knew that I was close to tears. THANK GOD SHE DIDN'T TRY TO HUG ME!... It would have been OVER! I managed to hold back the tears... She and his step dad talked to me and helped me feel better about not being at home! So... I say all of this to say: I'm not home for the holidays... it sucks a little... but I'm making it! Thank God for Jeremy and his family!

I'm at work now... I've fallen asleep twice... SO READY FOR MY SHIFT TO BE OVER WITH! Jeremy drove me to work today... Let's hope he's on time picking me up!!!!

::...Oh yea.. Wanna know what I got for Christmas so far?!....::

On the 23rd, Jeremy and I went to Memphis to see my family. We have a few traditions leading up to Christmas. On the 23rd, we bake cookies with the kids. Since I was off I decided to go and asked if Jeremy wanted to tag along and meet everyone! I won't make this long... JEREMY WAS A HIT, LADIES AND GENTLEMAN!!!! My family LOVED HIM! They all thought he was a perfect gentleman. He fit right in with my family... They are all LOUD and like to embarrass you with lame stories!... yep... They tried to embarrass me with a story or two... but they didn't win! I was not embarrassed...! They did tell some good ones though! lol Jeremy didn't appear shy at all! He talked with everyone... spoke in the circle before we said grace... He made me proud!... I finally have the approval of my family... so we're good! ;)

::....Ok, i had to mention that to tell this part....::

As part of my Christmas gift, my aunt gave me a bowl of her Shrimp N GRITS!. On Christmas morning we eat breakfast together... She always makes shrimp n grits for me.... I LOVE THEM SOOO MUCH! Since she knew I wasn't going to be home, she made me some to take back with me!!! GOTTA LOVE MY FAM! She also bought me a leopard snuggie... THAT I LOVE!!!

My bud, Mel Watkins bought me the coolest talking Japanese watch!! LOL... So random... so green... SO PERFECT!

My mom, Sabrina Washy bought me a cool, green sweater that coincidentally matched my watch, an orange graphic tee that says " i only date nerds", a JUNO DVD, and a magazine with MERYL STREEP on the cover!!! Yep... my mom's the bomb.

Jeremy is bringing my gift after work... I'll have to tell you that later. I heard from several people that I'm getting three gifts! can't wait! ;)

Ok... there are more gifts... but I'm tired of typing. I think I'm about to go back to sleep... This shift is going by slow as crap!!! I'm outtie!!!!

Until next time,

P-ce!

Random/Schmandom!!!

Hey Guys! I saw "Julie & Julia" last night at my friend's house. Although I fell asleep for a minute, it was actually a good movie. It had its slow moments, but I really connected with it. Julia Child loved to eat... so therefore learned how to cook!! I LOVE to eat... but I can't cook! HA! Julie Powell was just an ordinary girl who wanted more out of life! So yea... Julie blogs in the movie (something I've grown to love, myself) to keep her mind off of her sucky life. She's a huge fan of Julia Child and loves to cook so she decides to cook 524 recipes in 365 days and blog about the experience!!!! She also blogs about the ups and downs of that year as well! I loved it... AND it was a true story! :) I'm sure I'll watch it again to see what I missed in the time I dozed off. Meryl Streep (a new favorite actress of mine) plays Julia and Amy Adams plays Julie. It's a movie that will make you laugh and want to eat!!! YOU SHOULD GO SEE IT!!... Here's a trailer:

Anyway... I said all of that to say that the movie inspired me in a way... I want my blogs to be about more than just my random life! lol... I gotta find something that I love doing that will be more interesting to read!... But until then... Here's a little about me:

HANG-UP/SCHMANG-UP

I've been told by several family members and friends that I have way too many hang ups... lol I don't think so!!!... I'm a bit strange... but i don't think I have hang ups! lol What do you think?!

1.) I don't sleep well without my sleeping bag!!! lol... What?! It keeps me warm!

2.) I have a slight foot phobia! If you want to be my friend, keep your feet as far away from me as possible! :) Easy, right?!

3.) I don't like fruit... I don't like salad... BUT I LOOOOVEEEE VEGETABLES! :) Ok... the only fruit I can tolerate are pineapples in a can!

4.) I HATE when people bite their silverware when eating their food! It makes my flesh crawl!!! The thought of it makes me cringe.

5.) I HATE when people smack their food!!! It's sooo gross!!! My boyfriend has that BAD!!

6.) I HATE being tickled!! It's NOT funny!!! It makes me very angry! lol... So ok... wait... If you want to be my friend, keep your feet away from me and don't tickle me! EASY, RIGHT?!

7.) I can't cook.. AT ALL!! I believe that is a gift from God! I really do... I can't even make KOOL-AID!!! :) I'm just not cut out for putting just the right amount in something to make it taste good!

8.) I probably shouldn't admit this, but I like dull pain! I find myself randomly popping myself with my hair ties and pinching myself! Pray, saints!

9.) I'm a huge kid!! I would much rather spend my day watching cartoons and playing with kids and their toys!

10.) I can only eat my hamburger with ketchup and cheese only!!!! All of the other stuff is just too much! Maybe that's why I wouldn't make a great cook!!

**Ok!!!! That's enough! I'll do more when I'm feeling really random again!!!!**

Have an awesome day!

Until next time,

P-ce!

ZZZZZzzzzzz....

"What a week!!!!!...," She says on Tuesday! lol

*I'm sleep typing right now... Yep... it exists*

For the last few days I've been going to bed late (1 or 2am) and waking up early! Monday morning I had to meet up with a friend and our schedules are so jacked that we can only do it early... before our day actually starts. lol... Today I received a phone call from one of the supervisors at my new job so that's why I'm up now!!..... WAIT... WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!!!

!!!!!!!NEWSFLASH!!!!!!!

STIX HAS A NEW JOB EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!

PRAISE BRRRRREEAAAAKKKKKKKK!!!!!!

lol... I think I am the happiest person in the world right now. After being a server for almost two years... watching money come and go inconsistently... IT WAS TIME TO MOVE ON!!!! My friends are happy for me but I can tell that they all are concerned that I'm making the right decision in taking this job! Well you see, my homie AJ has been working there ever since we met (I believe) and she has said a time or two that she isn't too happy about where she is... At least that's what we all get from it.... I completely understand. We all are never happy where we are until we're doing what we really want to do in life... especially at our age!... So.... I guess I can understand their concern... oh and the hours are pretty different than what I'm used to. I'm getting to all that now.... So yea.... I was offered the full time position, making pretty good money (it'll pay the billS for sure), and working a shift I desire to work... 3rd shift (Midnight-8am!) I think the shift is perfect because I hear it's a slow shift and I can use that time to study when I go back to school in January... or sleep... or talk on the phone!... anything EXCEPT being on my feet for several hours at a time serving people who are hard to please!!!! YEESSSS, GOD!!! FOR THAT ALONE I THANK YOU!!! SHOOT!!!!! LOL

The supervisors are doing everything they can to get me on the schedule next week.... I was JUST hired last Friday!!! GOD IS GOOD!... definitely a Miraculous Manifestation!!!!!

ZZZZZzzzzzz

I was writing this blog to stay awake while I waited on the girl who called me earlier to call me back for one last little detail before she begins my background check!!! That has been done and NOW I'm going back to sleep for another hour... gotta be at work at 11am! Have an awesome week, guys! :)

Until next time,

P-ce!

Home for the Holidays!!!!

Before I begin... I can't believe it's already December!!! Like... Christmas is almost here!!! I LOVE Christmas!! The cold weather... the heat... seeing every body's Christmas decorations!!! It makes me feel like a kid again!.. I think I believe in Santa Claus around this time too!! LOL... It's something about this season... It makes me forget about how jacked up my life is and I just get HAPPY!!! IDK... lol... it's weird!

So yea... Thanksgiving!

I went home for Thanksgiving!... and had sooooo much fun!!! OMG! I must say though... when I first got to Memphis I was ready to leave! My mom was in the worst mood of all time... and it didn't help that I was grumpy and not in the mood for foolishness either! lol... My mom and I are a lot a like... so being around each other when we BOTH are in a bad mood is not cute... AT ALL!!! I made it in at like 9 or 10... and there was still a lot to be done before Thursday. It was my mom's bright idea to have everyone over our house for Thanksgiving!!! I hate when that happens because we end up being left with all the work when everyone leaves! You would think the family would want to help out just a little before they leave... GEEZ! AND... My mom likes to play Martha Stewart when she hosts events so we had a lot of last minute decorations to put up... We were up until about 1am.... Everything looked great though!!!

"The Thanksgiving Blues"

Thanksgiving day was a lot better! We all woke up in high spirits... laughing at each other and getting ourselves ready for our company! We were supposed to eat at 2pm... We didn't eat until like 4pm! Of course I wasn't too happy about that. My step dad didn't want to start until his grandmother arrived. She is pretty old, 88 to be exact, and he has this weird fear that she won't see many more Thanksgivings... So I kind of understood why we waited... It didn't change the fact that we all were STARVING!!!! My mom made me bring my guitar home so my cousin Derek and I did our best to entertain everyone while we waited! It was fun!... Derek showed out! He's been playing for like 8 years! Oh and we wrote a song called "The Thanksgiving Blues"!!! It ended up being the bomb.com! We all put in our own little verses about how hungry we were while my cousin played a few blues progressions on my guitar... MY GRANDMOTHER even got in on it! lol... My aunt recorded the whole thing, so I'll put it up when she emails it to me! Now THAT was the highlight of my weekend! We had a blast!

We tried a new tradition this year... We all sat around one HUGE table and ate. We usually sit all over the place... The men are usually somewhere near a TV... the women are usually in the kitchen/dining room area.... and the kids are usually around a table in my brother's room. I enjoyed the new way the best. We all sat around listening to each other's conversations... learning a lot from each other... both young and old! It was like a movie! We all were super happy and enjoying each other's company. I love my family! I don't get to see them as often as I would like.... it was great seeing everybody all at once!!!

WE HAD SOOOO MUCH FOOD! I don't even feel like typing it all! IT WAS ALL AMAZING!!!!!! And we had so much leftover! I'm soooo over turkey and dressing right about now! lol... Anyway... Thanksgiving was great! It ended way too soon though! :(...

I spent the rest of my "mini-vacation" at the house!... I didn't do much at all and it felt GREAT! I was supposed to go to a house party for my friends' birthday... I somehow got lost and ended up going back home! lol... I kind of didn't want to go anyway... so I wasn't too messed up about it. I ended up chillin' with my family... watching bootleg (*in the voice of Sabrina**..."MEMPHISSSSSS") DVDs and eating the entire time I was home! GOOD TIMES, FOLKS... GOOD TIMES! I talked to my friends back in Antioch a time or two... It sounds like they had a blast while I was away. I was happy to hear that considering that they all wanted to be home with their families as well!!! I missed them a lot though!

It is what it is...

I'm back in Antioch... in the BEST MOOD EVER!!! Pretty weird, right?! I usually come back from Memphis in the WORST MOOD EVER... hating my life... and contemplating moving back!... Not this time!!! IDK why!... umm... I DO know that I'm at a point where I'm done trying to figure out why my life sucks or why I'm not moving forward. My life IS WHAT IT IS... and I KNOW it won't be like this forever... So I might as well roll with the punches and "take life as it comes!"

In other news...

I haven't seen my boyfriend in NINE DAYS!!!... NINE WHOLE FREAKIN' DAYS!!! I MISS HIM SOOO MUCH! Yea, yea we talk on the phone every day.. but it's not enough. It looks like I won't be seeing him until Friday. :( We both work all day so we usually don't see each other until the weekends. SUCKS... but hey.. IT IS WHAT IT IS! This guy at work had on the same cologne that Jeremy wears and I almost couldn't take it. lol I want to see him... UGH!

Anyway... I need to shower... I smell like Olive Garden.

Until next time,

P-cE!